A Man I Miss

I'm baaaack!

I hope to compose more entries once my school life calms down a bit--which should be soon, as my last AP exam is this Thursday. Speaking of APs, I should be studying right now, but I just wanted to take the time to compose a little post.

This weekend was a huge one at our synagogue. First, we honored our senior Rabbi for his 25 years at our Temple. (This man is great by the way. He was married the same summer my parents were and they are fairly good friends. He also did my Bat Mitzvah) And today, in addition to it being the last day of Sunday school, (I'm going to miss my sweet kindergarteners) it was the groundbreaking for the $35 million renovation we're beginning.

I was blessed with the opportunity to sit up on stage with all of the clergy, lay leaders, and even the mayor. That was pretty fun. My adorable friends made signs that said "We love Ally!" and "Go Ally!" that made me laugh.

But by far the highlight of my day was seeing "Joy's" dad, one of my old Rabbis and I man I look up to in a huge way. As I mentioned in my very first blog post, he GAVE me my first guitar. Not just "oh here play this while you learn." but "Here is a guitar. I would like to share my love for songleading with you." And though I've kind of stopped playing because it got increasingly hard to find time to practice between rehearsals, DAFTY meetings, and homework, I still consider myself a songleader and I owe it all to him.

I gotta give myself credit.....I did NOT cry.

In front of him at least.

I cried Friday night when I found out he was at Shabbat services that I couldn't go to because I had closing night of my last high school show, (and last show ever? I don't know when I'll be doing theatre again....but more about that in a later post) and I cried when I babysat Saturday night just thinking about seeing one of my major role models that I haven't seen since September. (Yes I am a crybaby/wimp. I know.) And I most definitely cried when I got home and replayed all the things I WISH I could say to him in my head. Trust me, there is a lot. I went this whole weekend thinking seeing him again would give me some closure about his departure, but guess what? It didn't.

I don't know if I'll ever be able to gain closure. They say time heals wounds, and I really hope that is the case, because it's been a little under 8 months and it's like a gaping sore anytime someone mentions him or I think of him. (and I think about him a lot.) I only wish he knew that. At least it was nice to see him. I got 2 hugs and we talked briefly about college.

Which reminds me that I better get off the internet and go study some Environmental Science and Psychology! Hoping the time in between now and my next post will be a lot sooner than it has been.

Tata for now!